A Guide to Sucking the Life Out of Meetings
Are you tired of meetings that are as productive as a circle of cats trying to herd each other into a ball? Look no further than the Circular Circle Jerk technique!
This revolutionary new approach involves having each participant stand in a circle and stare at each other until everyone agrees to do what everyone already wanted to do, but were too afraid to say.
Step 1: Gather a Group of Sycophants
Start by assembling a group of people who are desperate for social interaction and validation.
- HR
- Marketing
- Sales
- Product
- IT
Step 2: Stare into the Void
Have each participant stand in a circle and stare into the center of the room, daring the others to say something interesting.
Example:
Step 3: Agree to Disagree
When someone finally breaks the silence, have the others nod in unison and agree to do what they wanted to do in the first place, but were too afraid to say.
Example:
Step 4: Repeat for 3 Hours
Repeat steps 1-3 for 3 hours or until everyone has reached a state of collective catatonia.
Conclusion
Voila! You now have a meeting that's as productive as a circle of cats trying to herd each other into a ball.